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A Twin Sister’s Grief

Feb 26, 2021 | Survivor Voices

By Laura Salas Rodriguez

As I look in the mirror I see our Twin face.
It happens everyday in the very same place.
I still have to drive pass the place you were killed.
Each time I have to, I turn my head away and get dowsed with chills.

I’m still learning to get pass the dark days all alone.
Yet many nights here without you, I wake up to screaming out loud, with a screeching moan.
This is a never ending nightmare this has torn me in half.
Who knew there would be so much grief and terrifying aftermath.

I wake up each day and ask God to give me good memories too.
Happy times we shared together just me and you.
Yet everyday is filled with tears at sometime of the day.
I’ve come to realize, these tears I cry will never go away.

If the triggers didn’t exist and they often do, I might be able to move forward, a little bit without you.
Our voice is the same I hear you when I’m Laughing or speaking.
I think you’re in the room then I realize, it’s not you it’s me, what was I thinking.
You’re still with me right here in my heart. I now realize NOTHING and NO ONE can ever tear us apart.

This Twin thing is for eternity it’s a bond we created before we were born.
Today and forever I’ll be the Twin left behind continuing to mourn.
You now sleep with the Angels in Heaven above.

I hold on to our uniqueness; we both so cared.
It’s a Twin thing, it’s a very different special kind of love so blessed we both shared…

I’ve been given the task to fight for your justice and my peace, a commitment and promise, I swear I shall keep.
Save a place for me Nini so one day we can be back together……. reunited and happy again forever and ever.

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