Survivor Voices: Surviving Father’s Day

by Paula Lopez | May 11, 2020 | Survivor Voices | 0 comments

Survivor Voices: Surviving Father’s Day

When you think about fathers day, some see the celebration, but for people like me, this holiday is usually one of the hardest. A year and a half ago, I lost my father to a senseless act of violence, and my world hasn’t been the same since. They say the first year of loss is difficult and that the second year is even more challenging, and it is true. But I also think about the father’s days that I was able to spend with him, and those are the memories I will always hold on to; those are the memories that keep me whole.

I remember my dad as a strong, loving man who played both roles in my life. It takes an extraordinary man to do that, and that’s just who he was, extraordinary. My childhood hero and years later, my best friend.

Feeling a variety of emotions is part of the process

He was my protector and my teacher. Unfortunately, he didn’t teach me about grief; because grief can’t be taught. Grief can make you feel ugly, weak, and dislike certain holidays, and that’s where I struggle. However, I am human, and it’s ok to feel those emotions. There will be holidays, like father’s day, where it may seem like there is no hope. There will be times where there will be an overwhelming feeling of sadness, but sometimes we have to allow ourselves to feel that, there is no getting over it and some days we can’t get through it and it’s ok.

This year I don’t want to celebrate Father’s day; it hurts. But regardless of how it makes me feel, I will reminisce about all the beautiful moments my father and I shared. I am going to allow myself to feel whatever it is I want to feel, there will be some tears shed, but there will also be a few smiles because I was lucky enough to call him my dad.

My Advice

We are all different people and can celebrate father’s day anyway we want. My advice to the people who are grieving their father this Father’s Day is to be kind to your self, and do what you feel is necessary to get through this day. Most importantly take a moment to breathe and remember its okay not be okay. You are not alone.

About The Case

On Tuesday, May 21st, Daren Encinas-Pablo was found guilty on seven counts, including Aggravated Assault, Armed Robbery and 1st Degree Murder of Nicholas Encalade. Sentencing is set for July 16th, 2019.

This article was written by survivor, Nicole Encalade and edited by Paula Lopez, freelance digital marketing specialist. She can be contacted at glopezp33@gmail.com

NOBODY DESERVES TO ENDURE THE MURDER OF A LOVED ONE ALONE

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Lock and Roll: Healing Through Skateboarding

by Paula Lopez | Sep 9, 2019 | Survivor Voices | 0 comments

Lock and Roll: Healing Through Skateboarding

My name is Treaven Mitchell. My father, MSgt Troy Gary Mitchell, was a retired Force Recon Marine who served 22 years. My mother is Kelly Mitchell and I am one of seven sons.

On October 28, 2009, my father was shot in the face by a teenager who robbed him of his cell phone and wallet which only contained $20.

On October 29, 2009, my family surrounded my father in his hospital bed and we sang Amazing Grace around him. During this hymn, my father took his final breath in this world.

MSgt Troy Gary Mitchell with his wife Kelly Mitchell.

Finding a new hope in tragedy

My life was turned upside-down because a teenager thought life was worth less than a cell phone and wallet. I still struggle to this day with everything that happened with my fathers passing but I want to let others know everything will be okay. Because of this tragedy, I turned my focus towards making a short documentary called Lock and Roll with my good friend Will Black. It’s about my personal story of my father’s murder and how I kept moving forward in life afterward.

Troy and his family.

Lock and Roll was sent off to a few film festivals and ended up winning three awards between the two film festivals it was accepted into. A few years later we decided to make a shorter version of Lock and Roll that focused more on how skateboarding helped me through my troubling times. I would love to share both versions of Lock and Roll with you in hopes it helps anyone out there who is struggling.

NOBODY DESERVES TO ENDURE THE MURDER OF A LOVED ONE ALONE

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